Walking in the snow

I realize this one is out of human control, but really is it ever possible to look cool while walking in the snow? I don't mean like on a hike with those tennis rackets on your feet or on the "slopes" (though I've never been skiing, I know all about the sweet ski lingo). I mean like walking to the bus or class, especially with a bookbag that throws off your entire center of gravity. It's impossible to look cool because you have to constantly worry about slipping and falling. Thus, you are forced to walk like a tightrope walker, on your tiptoes, with your arms at full sail. This already makes you look like a moron, but just wait until you hit a ice patch or a slush puddle and you slide a bit. Inevitably, your self-concious, panic-striken mind perceives this as imminent doom. Your arms flail wildly and you make some sort of unnatural noise that is usually remeniscent of the opposite of whatever sex you actually are. To top it all off, you have to look around frantically to make sure no one saw your little snow dance, which of course they did. For all of the above reasons, I think falling actually makes you look cooler than you do when walking in the snow. Falling is like accepting you're a loser. Conversely, walking through the snow while trying not to fall and still maintain a modicucm of coolness is like being that kid that talks too much and tells bad jokes and always brags about how much he/she drank last weekend...you know, a loser in denial.

I think I've made it pretty clear what my main point is: we must ban snow.